Loss and Realization

So lately I've been thinking a lot about how much we let pass us by in life. Mainly the relationships we let pass us by.

My little brother is graduating this year and I've realized that my happy fun life living at home with my entire family is about to come to a screeching halt when he leaves for college in the fall. Now I'm not saying my family will fall apart but it will never be the same again. The time I've had with my family living together will be effectively over. So I've begun to cherish every moment with my Mom, Dad, Sister, and Brother because things wont last long. Not only am I cherishing things with my immediate family but also my extended family such as my Grandfather and my Aunts and Uncles because who knows how many more Christmas's we will all have together? No one does, which is why the time we still have needs to be cherished.

Why does it take us so long to realize how much people mean to us? How come we need to either almost loose or completely loose what we love to make us realize how much we really love these people? Why do we let petty fights and squabbles separate us from those we love? I personally am not going to let these things keep me from my family any longer. And I'm going to spend every moment I can with them, whether I'm watching my Dad's silly movie or just sitting in the room while he watches it.

I wrote a lament for my creative writing class about these thoughts and I thought I'd share it with you all as well. Here it is:

Spring Rain

This crush of feelings

Overwhelms my heart

The warmth of the sun

Brings tears to my eyes

Remembering the dance

Under green buds

How happy we were

I cry out in sorrow

Words left unsaid

Catch in my throat

Unable even now

To bring themselves to light

Love is lost and worry

Fills my heart and soul

Lying on the fresh grass

In my weakness I tremble

The realization of what I had

Is now forever gone

The joys of childhood

Innocently wasted

Separation is the start

Now I find myself

Grasping fruitlessly

At that which I’ve lost

Spring rain falls

Reminding me

I do not cry alone

So yeah, I know its weird but that's the lament. :) Hopefully the next thing I upload that I've written is happier.

Pen pals and joyous occansions.

Wow so much has happened since yesterday and I'm excited to share the news with you all!

First of all I got the chance to talk to a good friend who I haven't spoken with for months now. We are internet pen pals, and before you give me that "you know people aren't who they seem to be bit" I know but we've been close friends for years now and both know without a doubt who the other is.

The most exciting thing about the conversation last night was that it revolved mostly around God and loving him. We discussed true faith and lukewarm Christians and the unmatched love of God. It was so amazing and refreshing to be able to talk with someone in length about him. I believe that this is one of the reasons that the Bible tells us that we need to go to church to fellowship with other believers. In having this conversation I realized that I do not know the bible nearly well enough to effectively talk to someone. :/ So I am now making it a goal to dig deeper into my bible so I can be more equipped to help.

Also seeing as today is Sunday I went to church to a very exciting surprise. My friend's parents had actually come to support their son's playing in the band. Now don't get me wrong my friend's parents go to church, they just don't go to our church and my friend and I have been praying that her parents will start coming to our church. So you can imagine my surprise when I saw them come in today! I was like wow! How amazing! The best part was that they actually seemed to enjoy the service.

I did have a little sang in my day when I read an e-mail sent to me by another friend, lets call her Debbie so I can quit saying my friend. :) Anyway Debbie has been trying to help one of her friends who's really fallen away from church. This friend was also one of mine at one time, but when she stopped attending church she also seemed to cut ties with me. q.q The e-mail Debbie sent me was the full transcript of 3 messages sent one by the friend and two from Debbie to each other. She wanted my advice on the subject and also asked me to pray for the girl. The contents of the e-mail shocked me, what the friend had said about me, my family, Debbie, and her family. I was hurt, but I understand what she is going through, and I'm going to continue to keep her in my constant prayers. Anyway this e-mail hit me again with the fact that I do not know the bible well enough to be of ample help. I rely on God's wisdom and teachings when talking to people but I've noticed and learned that I also need biblical advice too. Not only for my friends but for me as well.

I guess what I'm trying to say in this blog is How well do you know the bible? Are you like me in these situations where you try and help but you are lacking that extra push? Or do you know your bible well enough to be able to help counsel friends but you haven't been? Whichever one I hope that this little post of mine with help you in some way, even if you are neither of these people. :) That’s all for today folks!

An Opening

Hello to all! This is my first blog post, ever. So I'm not entirely sure what you say here but I've been told that I can talk about anything so that's what I'm planning on doing. :)

First of all I'd like to thank all of you who are actually taking the time to read this, I don't know how well it will go over but I hope you will enjoy my ramblings and thoughts.

I guess I'm going to take most of this first post to inform you all of what I plan to do with this blog. It mostly includes just talking, sharing my thoughts, feelings and beliefs. I also plan on hosting a favorite picture from Deviant Art. If you aren't familiar with DA it is a site that I frequent often that hosts many different forms of art.  I'd also like to do movie, book, game, and anything else reviews. I'm fairly sure I won't do it all the time but I will try to do it every once in a while. I may post a short story or two of mine that I've written, or I might not. It all depends on how much attention this little blog gets.

There's probably much more I'll end of discussing with you all but that's all I can think of right now.