Loss and Realization

So lately I've been thinking a lot about how much we let pass us by in life. Mainly the relationships we let pass us by.

My little brother is graduating this year and I've realized that my happy fun life living at home with my entire family is about to come to a screeching halt when he leaves for college in the fall. Now I'm not saying my family will fall apart but it will never be the same again. The time I've had with my family living together will be effectively over. So I've begun to cherish every moment with my Mom, Dad, Sister, and Brother because things wont last long. Not only am I cherishing things with my immediate family but also my extended family such as my Grandfather and my Aunts and Uncles because who knows how many more Christmas's we will all have together? No one does, which is why the time we still have needs to be cherished.

Why does it take us so long to realize how much people mean to us? How come we need to either almost loose or completely loose what we love to make us realize how much we really love these people? Why do we let petty fights and squabbles separate us from those we love? I personally am not going to let these things keep me from my family any longer. And I'm going to spend every moment I can with them, whether I'm watching my Dad's silly movie or just sitting in the room while he watches it.

I wrote a lament for my creative writing class about these thoughts and I thought I'd share it with you all as well. Here it is:

Spring Rain

This crush of feelings

Overwhelms my heart

The warmth of the sun

Brings tears to my eyes

Remembering the dance

Under green buds

How happy we were

I cry out in sorrow

Words left unsaid

Catch in my throat

Unable even now

To bring themselves to light

Love is lost and worry

Fills my heart and soul

Lying on the fresh grass

In my weakness I tremble

The realization of what I had

Is now forever gone

The joys of childhood

Innocently wasted

Separation is the start

Now I find myself

Grasping fruitlessly

At that which I’ve lost

Spring rain falls

Reminding me

I do not cry alone

So yeah, I know its weird but that's the lament. :) Hopefully the next thing I upload that I've written is happier.